I previously discussed a bias I observed in the prevalent cultures of this day, let me proceed by showing you more wrong in what we are beginning to hold as norm. Have you not heard where a teenager is hailed as becoming a man when he first have sex with a woman? Have you not heard when a teenager is hailed as becoming a man when he first finished three bottles of alcohol without faltering? Or when he woos several ladies with different tricks?
It’s no wonder then that we see young guys around today manifesting their manness by serially drawing the sword of their penis, downing several doses of alcohol, coupled with a number of other dangerous stimulants, and mastering the act of wooing ladies with lies. Imagine their depraved mindset in equating manness to sex, alcohol and lying.
It’s not much of a surprise when a boy hailed as becoming a man when he no longer squeezes his face after his dad has been giving him half cup of ‘Gulder’ or ‘Trophy’ to swallow becomes a serial drunk who sleeps around and not committed to his family. It should not be a surprise when a boy that was hailed as being a man when he was able to woo five ladies in a week turns out to be a woman magnet – ‘a minister of women affairs’. If our boys don’t turn out these ways considering the modelling they received, we should punish them; but permit me to tell you that these boys have successfully grown into the model of manness the society has offered them.
I believe the deal has been made simple with all I’ve said to conclude then that the real man is not in sex, alcohol or lying. A real man is a leader; simply someone that leads (watch out for my thoughts on leadership soon). He is someone that embodies a set of characters not just musk or charisma. A real man is
- Responsible: someone that own up for whatever he says or does.
- Capable of influencing himself to do the right things (Self Leadership). Only when he knows the right things anyways.
- A man of character: on the character list of a man virtues like; integrity, faithfulness, truthfulness, hardwork, sincerity, promptness, loyalty, chastity, self control, honesty and more should be found.
- Directional: he has a sense of focus, he is not just fighting the wind. There something he aspires and working towards in life (positive).
- Godly: he doesn’t see himself as the alpha nor the omega or rather both. He understands, acknowledges and respect the place of a supreme authority over his life.
Let us retrace our steps and begin to accurately define what it means to be a man. Let the men get it right and we will be on course to a society better in health.